I first met Ray D’Arcy circa 1997. He was the fresh-faced presenter of RTÉ’s schools quizshow Blackboard Jungle. I was the sullen-faced teenager leading the team of St Mary’s College, Naas, Co Kildare. My hair was an alarming shade of strawberry blonde, thanks to a couple of frantic efforts with the box bleach to get the roots to look a little less orange. My hands were sweaty. My nose piercing hole was closing up by the second. My heart was thumping. I was there largely against my will.

You see, I never intended to make the team. Qualifying as an individual for Blackboard Jungle involved taking a general knowledge test overseen by researchers who trav

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