It starts with a message to the second-class Educate Together WhatsApp – or two messages, really. The first concerns a side chat for the pupils in my son’s class who will be making their First Holy Communion. I get the little dopamine hit of child-related admin I can safely ignore, but it’s swiftly followed by a poll for a secular milestone event for all those who will not be making their Communions. There’s not much information at this point, but it’s called an “Eachtra” and is described as a party with mystical overtones – to take place in the school hall. None of this is the school’s doing I should stress – it’s an all-out wonderful place. This is about parents (myself included) and our appetite for ceremony. I read the exchange with growing alarm as names congregate next to the “Yes” option. Alarm, and something like annoyance.

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