Today I will be discussing House of Beamish, a show that’s only available on Netflix Cork, which is, of course, the best Netflix.

Scene 1

Arthur Beamish strolls onscreen. He has a big moustache and a pocket watch, and is wearing a powdered wig, leg warmers and a pair of Nike Air Jordans.

His brother Edward Beamish is already in there. He’s wearing a toga, a knight’s helmet, a digital watch and frogman’s flippers, and he’s holding a Sega Mega Drive.

“Arthur, as you know it’s the 19th century and all of our stuff is from the olden days, and I really need to talk to you about the beer factory left to us by our father, Papa Beamish, who, as you are aware, just died.”

“Edward, I am not interested in beer. I am interested in moustaches and riding lads.”

A load of Ewoks break into the room to a mash-up of Kneecap, Foster and Allen, and The Hokey Cokey. “Raaagh,” they say.

“Oh no! Fenians!” cries Anne Beamish, who is dressed as Smurfette and holding a fidget spinner.

“An bhfuil cead agam dul go dtí an leithreas?” cry the Fenians.

“And that’s their

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