10 Duffy (1980)

Duffy is the first in a series of crime novels about a bisexual private eye that Barnes published under the pseudonym Dan Kavanagh. It came out the same year as Barnesโ€™s debut novel proper, Metroland, but where that took seven years to write, this took 10 days. Not that it shows: this โ€œrefreshingly nastyโ€ (as Barnesโ€™s friend Martin Amis put it) crime caper is beguilingly well written, with passages that display all of Barnesโ€™s perception and wit. The plot of reverse blackmail and the shocking climax only add to the fun.

Sample line โ€œTwo in the morning is when sounds travel for ever, when a sticky window makes a soft squeak and three Panda cars hear it from miles away.โ€

9 The Porcupine (1992)

Barnesโ€™s shortest novel is a satire of the personalities in a collapsed European communist regime. Former leader Petkanov is to have a televised trial. He believes he did nothing wrong โ€“ โ€œThey loved meโ€ โ€“ and despises Gorbachevโ€™s western-friendliness, โ€œsucking Reaganโ€™s dick and then sucking Bushโ€™sโ€.

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