Therapists Explain Why Life Feels Worse After The Pandemic

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Longing for the way things were before March 2020 is a pretty universal experience. As we usher in the six-year anniversary of the COVID-19 pandemic, it’s not hard to feel like we’re missing or grieving a state of being that we never even got a chance to say goodbye to. A lot of people simply remember life feeling lighter in 2019, or 2016 or even 2008.

Simply put, everything seems generally worse after COVID. Right? Or is that the rose-colored glasses speaking?

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“I don’t think everything is objectively worse, but I do think that we feel worse and that we have to pay attention to that perception,” said Rebecca Moravec, a licensed professional counselor, trauma therapist and founder of Full Bloom Counseling in Denver.

For some people, certain elements of life may be worse now, and for others, circumstances may have been more dire a decade ago. But the feeling that something has shifted since the pandemic is prevalent ― and therapists say there’s a psychological explanation for that. Here’s why you may be feeling this way:

The pandemic was a time of immense tangible and intangible grief.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that nearly 850,000 Americans died during the height of the pandemic in 2020 and 2021 ― a time when families weren’t allowed in hospitals to say their goodbyes, and funerals couldn’t happen. Many people experienced unexpected grief after losing their loved ones.

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“We weren’t able to go through our traditional mourning rituals when we were really in the thick of COVID,” said Ruth Ellingsen, a clinical associate professor in the department of psychology at the University of Oregon.